Friday, October 25, 2019

Broken Doll Broken Heart-Penzu Journal-Wed. 9/6/2017 at 11:16pm

Broken Doll Broken Heart

Never The Same To Be Healed
The Cracks Begin
Shattered Dreams
Parts Falling Away

Broken Doll Broken Heart
Innocence Taken 
Once Treasured Now Left Behind
One's Trash Never To Find

Broken Doll Broken Heart
Can Or Will I Mend
Too Many Cracks Too Many Seams
Ripped Apart My Hopes & Dreams

Once Loved But Tossed Away
Will I Find A New Place
Will I Find My Way
Broken Doll Broken Heart

Will There Ever Be Enough Glue
To Mend All The Cracks
To Mend What You Continue To Do
Left In A Corner Sad & Alone
Tears Flow-Dark Days

For This Doll, Is There Light
A New Home A Ne Place
Away From Harm
To Mend The Cracks On Her Face
Putting The Heart Pieces Back Together

Broken Doll Broken Heart

To Mend To Live Again
A New Start
Never Left On A Shelf
Or Thrown Away 
Treasured Again Some Day

Thursday, October 24, 2019

If I Wrote A Letter-Penzu Journal-Wed. 10/3/2018 at 10:35am

If I Wrote A Letter

If I Wrote A Letter
If I Wrote How I Feel Would You Know
If I Wrote A Letter To Tell You
Would You See
My Hurt My Pain
Inside Of Me

If I Wrote A Letter
Would You Read It
Would You See In Side My Heart
My Pain Would You See Me

If I Wrote A Letter
Would You Read It~Would You Care
My Words Are Real
Never Fake
It Is What I Have

If I Wrote A Letter
Would You Read It Would You Care
You Never See Me As Others Do
Your Blinders Are Always On

Your Cold Eyes & Cold Heart
Will Not Allow You To See
Whats Really Going On Inside Me

No Words

When You Have No Words
You Are Silent

When There Are No More Tears
You Stop Crying
When All You Can Do Is Sigh

Your Heart & Mind Changes
Seeing A New Light
Far Away

Sending You In A New Direction
New Beginning
Never To Hurt
Never To Cry
Never To Sigh

In Order For The Soul, Not To Die
New Directions
New Paths
So The Soul Can Be Free & Fly

To All The Hurts & Bad
The New Path & New Light
We Welcome
The Hurt We Say Good Bye

New Direction 
Rebuild & Repair
No More Dis-pair
As The Fog Clears & The Dust Begins To Settle
The New Path Is Very Clear 
Happiness & Joy Is Very Clear

Wednesday, October 23, 2019

Narcissistic*-------------*Sociopath*-------Psychopath-Penzu Journal-Thu. 1/5/2017 at 1:25pm

Learning While Observing
A Personal Experience I Have Been Dealing With
Learning This About Someone Who Is Close In My Life

N-No Empathy                              S-Sympathy None
A-Arrogant                                     O-Overactive Sexual Behavior
R-Remorse None                          C-Chronic Manipulation
C-Condescending                          I-Impulsive Nature
I-Impossible                                  O-Opportunist
S-Shallow                                       P-Pathological Liar
S-Snob                                            A-Always Cheating
I-Interpersonal exploitation      T-Take In
S-Self Serving                               H-Has Grandiose Attitude
I-Incapable to love

P-Poor Behavior Controls
S-Shallow Effect
Y-Your inability To Break Bad Habits
C-Conning Manipulative Actions
H-Having No Responsibility For Own Actions
O-Observing How They Effect You
P-Pathological Lying
A-Always Seeking Stimuli
T-The Lack Of Realistic Long Term Goals
H-Having Early Behavioral Problems

These Characteristics I Have Researched In My Time Of  Your Deceit~Clarity In To This Personality Disorder That This One Close To Me Carries.

Wonder-Penzu Journal-Wed. 10/3/2018 at 12:53pm

I Will Always Wonder

I Will Always Wonder
Wonder if I Waited
Would I Have Had A Real Love
Would I Have Not Been Cheated

The Lessons I Have Learned
The Heartache I Have Had
What To Teach Me
Make Me Stronger
Sadness I Feel
Is Put In My Road
Test Of Some Sort

Why Must The Good Suffer
& Nothing Happen To The Bad
Karma Is Real
You Reap What You Sew

Badness I Have Not Reaped
Why I ask Why
Good On This Earth To Suffer
Pieces Of Them Die Inside
The Bad Steals From Their Souls

Will They Pay For Their Sins
Will They Ever Have Remorse
If There Is No Heart Or Soul
How Can They

Some Questions
Not Enough Answers
To Have Faith Give It To God
Let Him Take My Burden
Listen To The Messengers
Giving Me The Strength & Support

To Not Ever Ask The Question Why?

Friends Forever-Penzu Journal-Fri. 6/29/2018 at 7:42am

Friends Forever 

As Kids We Became Friends
Growing Up Together
We Were The Fab Five

Lisa, Christie, Cindy Marrianne & Glenn
Fun Times Laughter Being Carefree
From 5th Grade Until Middle School
Growing Up Changing Learning

Times Well Cherished
Growing Up Fast & Time Flew By
There Was A Time You Had To Part Lisa
As High School Approached

You Moved Away We Said Goodbye
But Not Forever You Always Wrote
I Wrote You Telling Each-other About Our Lives
High School Details & Drama

The Fab Five Started To Drift Apart
New Friends New Lives
Promises Of Friends Forever
Few Stayed In Touch
Others Slipped Away

Each One Of Us Chose Different Paths
Friends Forever Don't Always Last
Promises Of Forever Some Never Kept

Choosing Lives Careers & Family
Friends Walk In Friends Walk Out
Some Re-Appear & Some Disappear
Re connection After 40 Years
Never Really Lost

Our Caring Hearts Bring Us Back Together
Just As We Left Off Writing Letters
Again Exchanging Stories Lives
Things We Have Challenged
Trial & Troubles We Have Went Through

The Fab Five Now The Tender Two
Never Forgetting Our Childhood Past
Remembering Thar Real True Heart 
Will Always Last

This Gift We Have Pen To Paper
Fingers To Keys
We Will Always Be Close
Here To Inspire
Here To Listen
Here To Exchange Ideas
Listing To Each-other & Always Understanding

Sometimes Forever Can Be Short For Others
But Forever To The Tender Two
Though These 40 Years 
Real Connection Can Outlast

In Live People, Walk-In People Walk Out
People Fall Away Or Taken To Heaven
Some Keep In Touch
Others Reconnect Because of Their Bond
Only Loosened But Never Broken

For The Tender Two Reconnected Never Broken
Dear Lisa, I Write This For You 
For We Are The Tender Two

Friends Forever Love Through Out

Tuesday, October 22, 2019

To La La From Ruby Rose

La La Sangria

These Flowers I Give To You La La.

As We Embark on Our Journey Together As The Tender Two. 

Step By Step Our Ideas Our Words Ideas That Grow And Blossom Then Wilt And Reseed Growing Constantly Into Another Bunch Of Lovely Blooms For All To Read.

The Life Cycle Begins 
Creativity Flows As A Waterfall 
This Together Pens On Paper We Wrote As Kids
Gown Apart Then Back Together 
The Collaboration Continued As If it Never Ended
A Loving Chain That Never Stopped.

The Embers Are Striking Up A Warm Fire In The Hearth
Plans Details Inspirations Spark A Roaring Fire In Your Soul Connected To My Soul Then We Begin Again The Glow & Fire Become Plans For Us To Expand.

Dear Heart La La This Is Our Space & Place To Give To Create To Send Love

I Will Waist No More Time On That Bad Energy That Does Not Care It Is Time For Me To Rebuild & Repair
No More Dis Pair For The World To See
Our Writings Our Stories The Precious Words Of The Tender Two For Everyone To See. May Our Words Continue To Grow & Blossom To A Garden Of Love.

Without You This I Would Not Be Able To Do 
My Inspiration You Give Me The Words The Phrases
They  Come To Me So Clearly
Love To You Dear La La 

These Words I Give To You The 2nd Half Of The Tender Two

From Your Ruby Ros'e
My Blessing In You. XOXOX 

As I Sit Here Alone-Penzu Journal-Wed. 10/3/2018 at 10:40am


As I Sit Here Alone
I Ponder My Life
And I Wonder

The Life I Have Is Not My Own
I Gave Life & Now They Are Grown
Time To Find Out Who I Am
Time For My Self To Grow

Seems You Never Loved Me
The Way I Thought You Did
Never Loved Me As You Loved Her

The Pain In My Heart
You Can't Or Won't Ever See
Because Of Your Selfishness
Is It The Black Heart You Have

God Tells Me To Forgive
My Soul Continues To Hurt
What Can I Do
I Believed In You
I Believed In Love

Broken Heart
Broken Love

The Lengths Of Love
Do People Really Go That Far
Do They Go The Distance
Will They Sacrifice It All

I'm Not Sure What Is Love Anymore
Every Time I See A Love Story
I Remember How When You Made Love To Me
You Took My Clothes Off It Felt Like Real Love

I Sit Here Alone
Wondering Why
Was She Better Than Me
Or Was It Your Sick Mind & Sick Heart
No Excuses No Answers
Still Wondering
Knowing What I Know
Knowing Who You Are
The Wonder Has Subsided

Now What To Do Where To Go

Saturday, October 19, 2019

My Melissa My Dedication To You

My Melissa Keller

In High School Our Friendship Began
Young Girls 
Classes Together
Spirit Days
Passing Notes Fun Memories

How High School Passed So Very Quickly
Before We Knew It It Was Gone

Time Passed Our Separate Ways Began
Life Went On
Reunited Once Again 
Having Once A Month Lunches 
Our Time Gal Time
Having Lunch Doing Hair Drinking Wine

How I Cherish Those Moments
Talking On The Phone 
Having "Our Time"

You Helping Me Through My Tough Times
Always Listening
Lending A Shoulder & Ear
With A Heart So Loving & Dear
As Huge As The World
Loving & Kind

Us Being There For Each Other
In Times Of Sadness Grief & Despair
For You My Heart Is Always Hear
Those Distance Keeps Apart 
We Are Never Far From Each Others Heart
As The Seasons Change
We Remain The Same

Our Visits We Share 
Precious Time Spent

Which Is Needed More Often I Do Admit
I Love Your Dear Melissa
Your Very Close To my Heart
Sister Of Mine
I Dedicate This From Me To You
You Are So Very Dear
I Carry You In My Heart
With These Words Think Of Me
Special Words To One Special Lady
Melissa Keller XOXOXOXOX

Friday, October 18, 2019

Dust Of My Life-Penzu Journal-Wed. 3/6/2019 at 8:31pm

My Specs Of My Dust
Dust Of My Life
Mixed With The Lords Water
A Clay To Make A Vessel
A Vessel That Is Me

New From My Dust
Of My Old Life

Their Might Be Cracks
That Come Upon With Words
The Caves Of Hurt Upon Me

Lord Your Word & Water Heal Me
Loving Seal Knowing I Am Your Daughter
Unique & Special Love & Adored Every Day

Always Re Shaped & Re-newed
A New Vessel Thats Me
Abundant Blooms
Shining In The Sun

Beautiful Colors
When Leaves Begin To Fall Branches Pruned
Lord Your My Gardner & New Fruit Will Bloom

Continued Guidance Through Darkness
Despair Filled My Days
Looking To Your Light
Pulling Me Through
Always In Your Grace
Relying On Your Loving Face

The Days Of My Dust Have Been Rough
Keeping You Lord Close To My Heart
Teaching Me Every Day
Having Faith
Learning From You Smart

With Every Word We All Share
Testimonies To Give To The World
They Know Too They Are Love & Guided
By You Lord By You
 You Take The Dust Of Our Lives
Show Us Remade Can Be Beautiful

Whatever Tore Us Apart With You
We Can Regain Strength
We Can Repair
What Was Torn Down
Can Be Built Again

A Tower On High
In Your Faith
Soring Above
In Flight With Gods Love

My Soul Sista-Dedication To Tami Gardner

My Soul Sista

She Is My Soul Sista Miss Tami Gardner

We Are Cousins From Moms Who Are Sisters As Close As Can Be One The Oldest & One The Youngest

Same Values Same Hearts
Becky & Irene
Loving Unconditionally Always.

Tami & Me Soul Sistas
We Are With The Same Heart
Loving~Caring~Giving~Always Tender 
Tami Is Tender Heart Three
A Connection To The Tender Two

Growing Up As Kids Near & Then Far Apart
We Always Had Our Special Way
Our Hearts They Are One & The Same

We Can Do This Eyebrow Thing
We Know How Each Other Is Feeling

We Give Unconditionally

My Soul Sista Tami
I Dedicate This To You With All My Loving Heart

Special Heart Talented Lady Always Making Someone Laugh

This Is You Always Giving So Selflessly You Give Of Your Heart So Purely

God Made An Angel With Such A Soul That Sines Through Our Hearts Connected That Is Gods Plan He Knew What He Was Doing Connecting Our Souls From The Beginning From The Start

Tami I Dedicate This To You My Sweet Soul Sista
Who I Love So Deeply Your Heart Is In My Heart

Always Remember This Your Smart~Beautiful~Talented & Gods Daughter My Soul Sister Our Bond Is So Strong
It Will Last Forever As The Days~Nights~Weeks~Months & Years Are Forever Long
Soul Sistas~Tender Hearts~Loving Souls You & Me Gods Plan For Us To Be I Love You Tami XOXOXOXOXOXOX

Thursday, October 17, 2019

Non je~ne Regrette Rien~Edith Piaff-Tribute To A Great Lady-My Penzu Journal-Wed. 10/3/2018 at 12:45pm

Non~je~ne Regrette Rien

Beautiful Miss Edith Piaf

No Regrets

But Being So Good

Only To Be Hurt Again

I Will Always Be With You
I'm Not Going To Die Today
When It Is My Time~And I Do
I'm Always With You

Non~Je ne Regrette Rien

Never Regrette Explore & Do
Never Wait, Choose What Fills Your Heart
Choose Happiness
Choose What Is Right For You

Seize The Day
We Can Push Forward
Move On & Up

Non~jen~ne Regrette Rein
Ragrettes Have None
Build Happiness
Peace Love Joy
In Your Own Special Way

Never Let Your Joy Be Stolen
Taken With Words Of Hate
Taken With Evil Deeds Done Unto You

Each & Every Happy Moment Save
Non~Je ne Regrette Rien
Never Have Regrets

Life's Building Blocks
Puts Us Into Shape
Molds Us To Be Who We Are
To Give & To Teach To The World

Never Have It Taken From You
Spread Happiness Joy & Love
From A True Pure Heart
In Your Words In Your Thoughts
In Everything You Say & Do